In Training

Amelia tries to do everything she can to help with Everett. This includes offering to carry him, feed him, bathe him, dress him, etc. While she currently has 3 jobs - making sure all visitors wash their hands before touching him, washing his feet at bath time, and picking out his outfits - she is not allowed to do any of the higher pay grade jobs. I give her credit for continuing to try to show us she can handle it, though. Here she is showing her prowess with the Baby Bjorn...

Nice Try

So, what do you do when you think both of your parents are too preoccupied taking photos of your new baby brother?


Naturally, you sneak into the pantry, grab a bag of chocolate chips, and try to use your dog's claws to open the bag ....

Time Warp

Apparently, while Everett is still very much a baby, Amelia is now grown (or at least a disgruntled teenager). Here are the last things I heard before I went to bed last night...


Amelia: Randall, just please do what I asked you to do!

Everett: waaaaaaahh, waaaaaaahhhhhh, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!

No Rest For The Weary

Last night, I posted that having a newborn made me so tired that the only reason I was up past 9 was because I had to pay bills. It is certainly a good thing I didn't post that in an effort to get any sympathy. I heard from not one, but two, grandmothers today that I need to get more pictures posted on the blog immediately. So, without further adieu...or rest...here are enough pictures to keep you busy...

Sleeping angel...


Either about to give me the bird or trying to hold in his pacifier at all costs...


Getting better with the pacifier...


Taking a look around...


Snoooozing...


Tiny little piggies...


Resting up on mom...


Clearly annoyed with all the pictures...

New Schedule

Well, it is roughly 9 p.m...Three weeks ago, this would have meant it was time to surf the Internet, post on the blog, and begin relaxing a bit. However, since the arrival of Everett, I am literally only awake right now because I had to stay up and pay bills.

While I'd like to write a smart, enlightening blog post for you tonight. I actually feel like that story told you more about having a newborn than I ever could.

Thank You Very Little

Without going into any great detail, I would like to give a special thanks to a doctor we recently used. The mistake you made cost us an extra trip to the hospital, which cost us an extra $2,000 (I got the bill today...hence, this rant). If my lawn guy had spilled gasoline all over my lawn and then charged me for the sod to replace the dead grass, I'd fire him. But, you're a doctor so you get special rules. I would probably feel much better about it if you had shown any concern or even offered up the weakest of apologies. Hell, I would have been happy if it would have crossed your mind to check back in on your mistake to see if it had any ramifications. Instead, you essentially gave us an "oh well, it happens" and went on your merry way. I'm sure you've done many great things in your career and are in most ways a great doctor...but, in this instance, you suck and I really just want to fill your undoubtedly luxury vehicle with Everett's dirty diapers.

Roles

It has been mentioned to me on more than one occasion that I talk about poop too often on this blog. Well, guess what....this is a blog about a 2 year-old and a 10 day-old...hot button political issues don't come up as often as you'd think during my chats with them. Having said that, here is another post about poop.

On several nights since Everett was born, he has had a hard time doing his business. One trick we have found to be successful is to have me bend my knees and let him lean back on them while King Everett perches upon his royal throne. I patiently wait there until we hear the fruitful sound of him filling his diaper...which, by the way, sounds like somebody sitting on a Whoopee cushion that has been partially submerged in water. Afterwards, he is the happiest little guy around while I am left to contemplate the depths of my new role. I knew I'd have to assume many responsibilities as a father - teacher, chauffeur, protector, wrestler, chef. However, if you had asked me to name all the things I'd do for the happiness of my children, I'd have gotten pretty far down the list before I came to "pose as a human toilet".