So, I started this blog to document life before Amelia with the hopes that she would begin "writing" her own posts. She hasn't been inspired yet, she said, so I figured I would offer some of my thoughts. As someone who has always demanded at least 7-8 hours of sleep per night (seriously, I was the kid at slumber parties who fell asleep at 8 p.m.) but is now running on 2 hour cat naps strung together over the course of a night, these thoughts are truly babble.
They don't give a trophy at the end of labor. They should. My labor lasted a little over 11 hours including 2.5 hours of pushing something the size of a basketball out of something the size of key hole. At the end of it all, I came away with a renewed love of so many people. I loved Dr. Palermo and my nurse Mary. For days after delivery I kept thinking of how I could repay them for their help during that ordeal. After racking my brain, I realized that no fruit basket or flowers could make up for what they had to deal with that evening. We shall leave it at that. I was just glad to talk to Jenn Keyes days later to realize that I wasn't the only nutcase who cried for days because she "missed" her doctor.
As Dr. Palermo and Mary worked away, there was one person there going above and beyond the call of marriage. Through the birth and weeks after, I have come to love Randall more than ever. I didn't think it was possible to love someone more, but, surprise, I do. He was by my side the whole time telling me what a great job I was doing. He got me the world's best burger after everything was over. Most of all, he loves me after all of that. Randall is great at so many things, but his greatest talent truly lies in how well he loves me.
During labor and afterward, there were so many people there to show us how much they cared about us. Our family waiting patiently for hours for Mia to arrive, and I've never seen a bunch of adults go so nuts over a baby. It was nice to once again maybe even for one of the last times, to be someone else's baby. Thanks Mama and Daddy for making sure the staff was on task and for taking care of me even when I was sleeping. The help I got during my first week from Mama deserves a post all it's own.
Then there was Jenn G. She is one of the best friends I've ever had. When she walked into the hospital room the day after Mia arrived, her soft voice and the smell of cheese biscuits and cupcakes were just what I needed. Jenn, I can't tell you how much I needed a visit from you when you were there. XOXO.
Who am I forgetting? Oh yes, Miss Mia. Those few minutes when they handed her to me when she was born were the most surreal of my life. It was as if everyone went away and it was just me and her. There she was with her wig of dark hair and big eyes looking up at me. Even through my epidural haze, it was love. For those first few days when I didn't know what to do with her, I still just wanted her close to me. I would have also preferred one of those baby nurses to be close as well, but nonetheless, those feelings are still there. When Randall lets me out of my crate (house) to run to Sam's or Harris Teeter alone, those trips are truly delicious, but I find myself racing to finish my errand to get back home to her. For the first time in my life, I have let go of everything in between and am so thankful for this time I've been given to spend with this precious little brunette girl with chubby cheeks, crazy toes, her daddy's butt chin, her mama's nose and a habit of getting the hiccups at least twice a day. To quote Paul Simon, as long as one and one is two, there will never be a mother who loves her daughter more than I love you.
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