39 Never seemed like such a big number

For anyone who hasn't had a child, I will attempt to clue you in on how it feels to be a dad-in-waiting in the 39th week of pregnancy (Meggan will have to explain what it is like to be 39 weeks pregnant as I am not foolish enough to think I have ANY idea.) I cannot encompass all the thoughts and emotions I have gone through over the last 39 weeks in one blog post, so here is a quick rundown of weeks 1-38

- "I'm pregnant"; wow, I can't believe I'm going to be a dad. I am SO ready for this; I'm going to read and listen to everything I can to prepare; Really?!? 10 diapers a day?!? Feed them every 3 hours?!?; wow, I can't believe I'm going to be a dad. I am in NO WAY ready for this; How hard can it be to find a daycare?; An 18-month waiting list and $1,000 per month?!? How much can I get paid to donate plasma?; Well, the ultrasound looks like a gummi bear, but the heartbeat is the greatest sound I've ever heard; I'm not sure how we are going to afford all the baby stuff we need; I cannot believe the overwhelming support from friends and family. This baby thankfully has all she needs and more; I hope she looks just like her mother; Doh! The only thing cleared up by that ultrasound was that she has my butt-chin. These classes are making me feel more confident; Dear Lord, THAT is what a HEALTHY diaper looks like?!? YES! We are 3 centimeters. She is ON THE WAY; Crap! We are STILL 3 centimeters. She is never coming.

And that brings us to week 39. By now, I feel like we have read everything we are going to read, bought everything we are going to buy, and packed everything we are going to pack. We have plans, backup plans, and alternate backup plans for what to do with the dog. We have multiple generations of family members on travel standby. We are currently making Mia a lullaby mixtape. There really is nothing left to do but wait. The only comparable feeling I have ever had is at bedtime on December 24th. This is Christmas Eve - if it were in the movie Groundhog Day. Each night, we anxiously try to go to sleep wondering if Santa is coming. If he does come tonight, what is he bringing? Were we naughty or nice? We are too excited to sleep well, yet too scared to sit up and think about it. So far, each morning has come and gone with no Christmas. Perhaps tonight is the night? I'm not sure how much longer we can stand it, but I do know how much longer we will wait... as long as Amelia wants us to. This is probably a life lesson I should get used to.