I'm not sure exactly when I became old, but it has very obviously happened to me. I'm guessing it partially coincided with Amelia being born. All I know is when I watch certain channels, particularly certain "music video" channels, I feel very frightened about what is out there for my baby girl to witness. While I admit I'm not exactly in the scene, I can't help but think these stations, and the media in general, glorify all things sex, drugs, and rock and roll. I have no issue with the way adults want to live their lives as long as it doesn't affect anyone else. I do, however, struggle with how I am going to deal with Amelia's access to these types of things as a child. I don't want her segueing from a Taylor Swift concert special to two drunken strippers wrestling on a reality show. That said, it is unfortunately more common to see the latter. Given this, here is a list of toys I am dreadfully fearing in the future...
1) My First Lil' Stripper Pole - A pole designed for kids who want to imitate mommy's strip-aerobics class.
2) Sippy Pimp Cups - Tiny, gold and diamond plated sippy cups for the most stylish of children
3) Anatomically correct paparazzi-flashing dolls - dolls of all your favorite starlets sans underwear. With the push of a button, up goes the skirt, just like Hollywood's nightlife-loving ladies...Britney, Paris, Lindsay, etc.
4) Teddy Rapxpin dolls - It's just like the Teddy Ruxpin dolls from your youth, except it teaches your child to rap about gettin' money, poppin' Cristal, and pullin' out your glock if someone gets out of line.
Okay, so maybe these toys are a bit exaggerated, but I honestly do feel it is becoming an extremely tough exercise for a kid to just be a kid. My goal is not to shelter Mia, but to allow her to think the world is a safe, clean place to live as long as I possibly can.
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