Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Bye Bye Baby

As a Jack-a-Poo, in my opinion the smartest breed of dogs, I have developed a keen sense of observation. Recently, I have observed a trend that I couldn't enjoy more if you covered it in bacon. This trend is the baby's new found habit of barfing before, during, and after every meal. It's not that I love barf. Well, okay, I admit it...I ate it the other day, but I was just trying to help clean. However, the real reason I am excited about Baby Pukes-A-Lot is rooted in the story of Miss Kitty. Miss Kitty used to live with us before the baby came. I hated her. I loved her. I hated that I loved her. I loved that I hated her. When she was here, I had to split all my attention with her. She was a beautiful cat. I mean, seriously, I don't know what kind of product she used in her fur, but it was working. Fortunately, she had a fatal flaw - I'm pretty sure she was bulimic. She would eat, and then throw up like clockwork. A person can only step in cat barf so many times before they snap. And thus, she no longer lives here. So, as you can see, I'm pretty sure I found the baby's ticket out of town. If she can just keep up this barfing streak, they'll be buying her a one way, all expense paid trip to the farm where her and kitty can blow all the chunks they want. They just won't have me around to clean up their messes.

- Sophie

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